Birthday Messages

Birthdays are fun, because (hopefully) you get lots of messages from friends and family wishing you well and extending positivity in your direction through thoughts, words, and actions. While I appreciated all of the "happy birthdays" I received this year, here are a couple of my favorites, for various reasons:

Text Messages

• Clint B: Happy birthday you sexy beast!
• Adam, Linds, G, S, & Z: Happy happy birthday to you. Your birthday pony is in the mail. We really hope it doesn't get lost. Love you.
• Stanley S: Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! You look like a monkey, and you smell like what I think Pierce Brosnan smells like. Feliz cumpleanos hermano!
• Stanley S: I was just kidding. You don't really look like a monkey.

Facebook Wallposts

• Darren H: Happy birthday! May you continue to school me in fantasy baseball.
• Marlayne PN: Happy Happy birthday punkin'.
• Jen KP: Happy birthday!!!! I truly hope your hair didn't all fall out, that would be just terrifying. Not that you wouldn't look good bald...
• Jane M: Happy Birthday to you, Smyth!!! I hope you have a wonderful day. And don't listen to all those people who say a gut and less hair is an unattractive combo - they're just jealous!
• Brad P (note, this is a special birthday haiku): A fantastic friend. And a very clean roommate. Happy Birthday Smyth.
• Haley WG: Happy Birthday Aaron. If I had a box of Nutri-Grains and the $50 it would cost to ship them to you I would! Hope you have a great one.
• Meg S: Happy birthday Smythie!!! I like you the way I are...

Some of these involve inside jokes and some go all the way back to junior high, but they all brought a smile to my face (as did the rest of the "happy birthdays" that I received). Thanks so much to everyone for making my birthday and birthday week a great one!

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National Christmas Tree

There are a lot of great Christmas trees, but only one can claim to be THE National Christmas Tree. It's right by the White House, and I went with some friends to check it out tonight. We had a pretty good turnout, and the tree looked pretty good. Granted, the lights appear to be on some sort of netting that is draped over the tree, but it's still cool. Plus, they have all the smaller trees around for each state and territory of the Union, so it's fun to go around and look for your state's tree.Also, there's a little Santa's workshop and you can go in and get your picture with the jolly fellow. None of us sat on his knee, though, because that'd just seem a tiny bit creepy.

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Gingerbread Bowl

My friend Claire came over and brought us a fun project to work on: gingerbread houses! She made one for her parents' house and I made one for my apartment. It's a very satisfying thing to take a bunch of seemingly random parts from this

to a standing edifice like thisto a highly-polished and potentially award-winning finished product like this

And how did we accomplish our building feat? By reading the instructions, of course!

Of course, prior to decorating and reaching that third stage, we had to give the walls and roof some time to set. Since we didn't feel like just kickin' around the apartment, we decided to go bowling. Needless to say, being the expert bowlers that we are, there was a lot of this

and this

hahaha Yeah right. But at least we had fun and got out of the apartment for a bit :P

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If It Were Me...

So I was driving on Jefferson Davis, and there was a car stalled in the middle (of 3) lanes. A guy [henceforth known as #1] was pushing the car from behind, so I figured "okay, they've got it covered", assuming that one guy was pushing [#1] and a friend was steering. As I passed, I saw that no one was steering, meaning this guy [#1] was stranded on his own and trying to get out of the road to not jack up traffic.

I turned into the next parking lot that I could and ran back to help. By the time I'd gotten there, a random passerby [#2] was pushing and #1 was steering. I joined in the pushing effort [making me #3 in the situation] and we got the car out of the main road onto a sidestreet. At this point, another helper [man #4] came from where I'd parked and also offered his services.

Once we'd gone a little further, #1 attempted again to start the car, and it fired up. He thanked us [#2-4] and went on his merry way. After short salutations with my comrades-in-aide, we all parted.

I was struck by how great that short example was to me of the kindness and goodness that exists within people. None of these mid-20s to early-30s guys (guessing based on looks) knew each other before, and we didn't expect any payment or direct recompense for our assistance. Nor do we even expect to see each other ever again. In the moment, these thoughts didn't cross my mind. I just knew that if it were me alone with a struggling car stranded in the road, I would hope that others would jump to my aide.

People are good.

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Jetsons, Here We Come!

So right now I'm on a flight from Salt Lake City, Utah, to Baltimore, Maryland.

And I'm on the internet.

So.

Cool.

1452: Gutenberg prints the first book.

1492: Lead pencils first used. Colorful plants rejoice.
1714: Typewriter patented.
1765: First steamboat voyage.
1790: Shoelace invented. Adios, shoe buckles!
1802: Steam locomotive patented.
1819: Bicycle patented. Lance Armstrong's ancestors feel strange new sense of greatness.
1844: First telegraph message.
1862: Machine guns patented and bowling balls invented. It was a very good year.
1867: Nobel patents dynamite. Future Boy Scouts rejoice.
1876: First telephone call by Alexander Graham Bell. He is charged a $10 first-timer fee by his provider.
1886: Karl Benz patents first automobile.
1903: Wright brothers complete first airplane flight. Ostriches and penguins extremely jealous.
1928: Scotch tape marketed. FOTC starts writing hilarious song.
Etc, etc, etc. Click here for a great and overly extensive technology timeline.
2009: I'm using the internet on a plane. Awesome.

At this rate of technological innovation, my Jetsons car must already be in production somewhere in Japan and should be shipped later next week.

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Thanksgiving in Utah

The holidays are about family, and that's why I love flying home to Utah for Thanksgiving. Spending time with the family is always a blast, and I can't imagine a better way to spend the week. Pie Night
As family traditions go, this is right up near the favorites. We've been hosting them for upwards of 15 years now, and Pie Night is sweeping across the nation, slowly but surely. We had a pretty good turnout this year, and plenty of pie to go around and fill our bellies. I think I had around 6 small slices. Personal favorite: banana cream. Football
One of Adam's buddies organized some turkey day football, so Adam, Pete, and I went to play. Early on, Pete and I were putting on a show with interceptions and catching long passes. The opposing team started focusing on us, so we couldn't get as many big plays, but that opened things up for some of our teammates. We were playing tackle, and I started to get reminders that my body in high school may have been a football body, but now I've got a runner/cyclist body. Hits started to take a toll, and I was hurting by the second game, but it was still fun. Adam started to tear it up in the second game, and he was finding the holes in the defense for some big gains and touchdown catches. By the end, I think we were all pretty tired and somewhat beat up, but it was a great way to start the day.Thanksgiving
Some of the Cravens came over and we all enjoyed a delicious Thanksgiving feast of Smythical proportions. Wow, I really like that word. Smythical. You may see it more in the future on my blog, though I'll try not to abuse it. Anyway, back to the task at hand. Between the Smyths and Cravens, I don't hesitate that my family can make some mighty fine vittles. My mom made the bird. Aunt Elaine made the mashed potatoes. My cousin Emily made creamy veggies. And I don't know exactly who made all the rest, but my tummy thanks all who were involved.Fantastic Mr. Fox
In the afternoon, some of us decided to go see a movie. This is a pretty standard event for us on Thanksgiving, and we try to pick a good one. Megan, Dave, and I joined the Cravens in seeing the modern adaptation of one of our beloved childhood books, "Fantastic Mr. Fox" by Roald Dahl. It's one of those that mom read to us in bed, so being reminded of the story gave me warm fuzzies (which is curious, since it's really not a very happy-go-lucky storyline). We all agreed that the stop-motion work was fantastic and showed real craftsmanship. As is typical of Wes Anderson movies, there was a great focus on the relationships between oddball characters, and the soundtrack was excellent, too. I loved it.Family Pictures
With the twin girls growing more every day, and Peter and I living on the East coast but home for the weekend, Grammy (my mom) scheduled a timeslot at JayLynn Studios to have some family pictures taken. First we have pics taken of all of us together, then some of Adam & Lindsey's family, then Peter & Jordyn, and finally some of my Mom & Dad. I'm just gonna go ahead and say what everyone's thinking: I have got an incredibly attractive family :) Family Fun Time
When it's cold outside and we can't really play trampoline games or run around playing sports, we turn to fun indoor activities. This time, we played Guitar Hero Metallica, went to Fat Catz for bowling, played Cranium, and watched the movie "Up!" Of course, during all of these we were talking and laughing and having a good time. Which really highlights what I'm most grateful for during the holidays, my family and getting to spend time with them. I love each of my family members and can't wait to see them again at Christmas!

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Dear Tollroad Idiot

I should have known when I got in the Exact Change tollbooth lane and you were clearly looking all around your car for change. Your head was bobbing up and down and left and right as you searched every nook and cranny of that stupid maroon sedan (I think it was a Taurus) for any nickel or dime you may have dropped between the seats during your last late-night McDonalds drive-thru run.

My instinct was to drive around you, since you were leaving about 6 car lengths between you and the car in front of you. Your efforts to stall for more time were a sign that you were going to make my morning hellish, and I should have listened to my internal alarms and passed you right there before the tollbooth.

But I didn't.

I waited in line, like a good little tollroad driver. And when you got to the coin drop, and only threw in a couple coins, and the light didn't turn green, that's when I knew for sure I didn't like you.

And when you went back to your searching and finally grabbed some random coins (I'm assuming pennies, or you'd have used them the first time) and tossed them in the direction of the coin drop, and only about 20% of the coins made it in but you weren't concerned enough to pick up the ones that missed (which strengthens my penny assumption, since you knew the pennies weren't going to actually make a difference anyway), that's when I knew that I loathed you.

And after I gave a polite honk to tell you to just go through and accept that you're going to get a ticket in the mail for being unprepared, going in the Exact Change lane when you obviously should have chosen a Full Service lane, and subsequently ruining all our lives, that's when you decided to inch forward and try to talk with the police officer by the next tollbooth over. You still wouldn't get out of the way and let the ever-growing line of cars behind you in the only open Exact Change lane pay the toll with their exact change and get on their merry way!

Cue my visions of Fried Green Tomatoes.

So I gave another polite honk, even though I wanted to lay on that horn with all the fury of a thousand suns, and then tear my door off and throw it at your car. But still you inched forward, finally reaching the point that the bell went off telling everyone that you'd just driven through without paying.

However, I don't think you were far enough forward for the camera to catch your license plate yet. And still you inched forward, still trying to get the cop's attention, but he wasn't interested in helping you (I'm guessing because he could smell the stench of your ineptitude emanating from your open passenger-side window.

Once you'd pulled forward enough that I could advance, I pulled up to pay my toll. Elated to leave you behind to sort out with the law your incompetence and whether you should be allowed behind the wheel of an automobile.

Can you say "revoked license?"

I gave you a few extra seconds and let you move 5 more feet, and then I threw in my three quarters (note: exact change, as required by this lane), paused for the green light, and then pulled forward.

And as I did so, I heard that bell go off, and my utter hatred for you was cemented, tollroad idiot. If I get a ticket in the mail as a result of your screwing up the tollbooth system and my toll not registering (even though the light went green), I will wish upon you even fouler things than are currently germinating in my mind. Let's just hope it doesn't come to this. In the meantime, please learn to observe signs, get in the correct lane, be prepared, and generally pull your head out of your rectal cavity.

Sincerely,

Aaron

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